My Story

However many tries

However long I stay Here.

It’s time to know it

I love my Parents, truly.

I would not be in this Position at all, whatsoever

if they weren’t Good people deep down.

I feel things deeply and childhood, for all Humans

has things for each of us, that hurt

that trap

remind

but our childhoods can give hope, strength

we can be unreasonable about somethings and shockingly standoffish and rude about other things.

These truths can only be for me I have come to realize that.

pointless trying to smooth it over for You

I was emotionally abusive on women, when I was first trying to understand dating and sex and all that crap, a long time ago .

And now

Still am apparently

I didn’t even realize I was automatically Rejecting all of them.

When I was 20 years old, I was in rehab and I would end up meeting and sleeping with an underaged Chick , in a Drug Rehab

that was my rock bottom .

and it’s a weird one, because the Norms

But it’s not too creepy, also.

I haven’t had a normal relationship, ever since.

and I forgive everyone involved

myself, First

I was catfished pretty hard Online, before that too

for about 1 year i thought i was falling in love with a Hottie from NYC

but it was a Mid from Buffalo

i dont know how to explain this crap much more

I am allowed to feel bad and creepy about that whole experience

and I am allowed to move on and meet new women

as long as I am clear and not Manipulating them

( too too much )

( there’s Seducing then there’s just … Torture… )
( i will remember this )